Eastbound & Down Please Go Away

So Danny McBride is back on "Eastbound & Down" sorry I'm a bit late but let's be honest this show fucking stinks.

I'm going to start off with a couple positives:

Katy Mixon looks like she lost 3 pounds, perhaps she rocked the elliptical with zero resistance once a week for a couple months.

They play a Black Keys song in the beginning of the first episode. (Which I am watching as I write this)

I'm pretty sure this season will remain in the United States which means there will be a lot less room for cheap, quasi racist, phoned in jokes based around Kenny Powers just BEING in Mexico.

That's all I can think of right now so far, granted I haven't even finished the first episode. The part about "Eastbound & Down" that kills me is that it was so great in the first season. Perhaps I am recalling the show with rose colored glasses but I remember powering through the first season in a weekend and loving every minute of it. I also remember suffering through the second season and contemplating canceling my HBO subscription. It was as if the writers gave up, realizing they would make enough money on chubby college kids buying goofy t shirts and the show would stay afloat based entirely on poorly constructed catch phrases.

This season seems like it will be even worse than season two. The jury is still out as I have 2.5 episodes to watch.

Oh yeah I forgot to mention Kenny is now playing on a team in Myrtle Beach South Carolina and Jason Sudeikis is on the team with a hacky Southern accent. I'm shuddering as I write this.

The thing about this foolish show that kills me the most is the fact that it survived when so many other great shows did not. The episode is concluding right now with Danny McBride and Katy Mixon fighting a redneck couple at a mini-golf course.

I have zero hope for this series but I guarantee it wont be cancelled for at least two more seasons.

ANK

Parks and Recreation featuring Louis C.K.

So I have been on board with "Parks and Recreation" this entire season and have been loving it so far. I am very late to the party as this is their fourth season and the show seems to just continue to do well. It has a loyal following and a number of award nominations and I generally laugh out loud at least once every time I watch, which is big for me. Their most recent episode featured a cameo from Louis C.K. who is without question one of the funniest comedians performing currently. Needless to say I was very excited when I turned on my DVR-ed episode this morning and saw his face. I anticipated a hilarious episode and sadly I was let down.

Louis C.K. is a phenomenal comedian and a decent actor in his roles on "Louie" and "Lucky Louie" (when playing himself). However this latest "Parks and Recreation" episode missed the mark big time. I found Louis' character to be flat and unbelievable and it was really hard developing any sort of feeling about him either positive or negative. The entire episode dragged to the point where I just cooked my breakfast and stopped paying attention.

My theory here is that as of late NBC has been going out of their way to be the edgy network TV station. CBS has their formulaic cop shows and fucking Sheenless "Two and a Half Men", ABC has the now vomit inducing fallen from grace "Modern Family", "The Bachelor", and now "The River" which I shut off, and NBC wants to make people believe that they're like FX or even HBO and get some cool young hip viewers. In the past year NBC has debuted the pathetically edgeless "Whitney", "Chelsea Lately", "Two Broke Girls" and now this most recent episode of a show that works and works well but just totally bombed with the edgiest comedian around. Louis C.K. toned down, out from behind the mic, and molded into an NBC character isn't funny and never will be. I can imagine him trying to ad-lib lines about his cock and NBC executives getting really nervous and begging him to stick to the script. It's tragic that the episode didn't work because I truly love the show but this one just missed.

A few other things I didn't like about the latest episode of "Parks and Recreation"

1. Aziz Ansari's singing/annoying baby talk voice/general attitude (in this episode and the last one)

2. Adam Scott acting like a total pussy

3. Not enough Ron

4. Rashida Jones getting work because she's Quincy Jones' daughter

ANK

Netflix is Making Moves

Netflix hasn't had the greatest year in terms of subscriber loss due to their plan to charge a separate fee for streaming video and DVDs. So I guess it makes sense for them to do two of the awesomest things I've heard in a long time.

1. "Lilyhammer": The new Netflix Streaming exclusive show starring Steven Van Zandt. Steven was on Howard Stern today promoting "Lilyhammer" which premiers on Netflix next week. In the show Steven will reprise his role as a mafia hit man (not Sil) who has been placed in the witness protection program. After watching the trailer I learned that Steven's character on the show requests to be placed in Lillehammer which is a town in Norway and home to the '94 Winter Olympics. As you can imagine it seems to be a terrific fish out of water story and should be entertaining as hell. I'm a huge fan of Steven's, he was one of my favorite characters on the Sopranos, and I cannot wait to check out his performance in his own vehicle on February 6th. I am also very curious to see how well received it is due to it being Netflix' first original program. Watch the trailer with the link below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bfRgVbp9gSY

2. Arrested Development: I couldn't possibly be happier about this. Netflix has picked up the rights to stream the new season of "Arrested Development" for it's triumphant return in 2013. The entire original cast is back and it's going to be amazing. The show was cancelled back in 2006 after 3 seasons. It is one of those shows that just crushed fans when it was cancelled and the fact that it is returning is just outstanding. I am just learning of this today but will anxiously await the new episodes when they premier. Here's a link to an article in the Chicago Tribune from today about it:

http://www.chicagotribune.com/entertainment/sns-rt-us-arresteddevelopmenttre80u1lg-20120131,0,902553.story

ANK

We don't need an Office spinoff.

I read the news online yesterday that NBC is in talks with Rainn Wilson aka Dwight Schrute from "The Office" about developing a spinoff based around Dwight and his beet farm Schrute Farms. Needless to say I was displeased as I am a rampant cynic and loathe cheesy network attempts to revive dead plot lines and characters.

The show is projected to air midseason 2013, and Paul Lieberstein aka Toby (also from "The Office") is involved in development and I imagine it'll be a steaming pile of horse shit. I'm sure it will have the worst promos known to man featuring Rainn with his big goofy head that makes me want to crack it open with a hammer. If you fail to share these feelings with me watch "The Rocker" and you will be on the same page.

There's no deal inked yet and the show is not a guarantee but if it does get made I envision it testing well because most people have horrible taste when it comes to television. The things that irks me the most about this spinoff idea is that "The Office" has clearly jumped the shark, James Spader is ok at best, and the show has really not been funny since Michael Scott (Steve Carell) left. So why the hell is NBC not working to make "The Office" funny again? It's also projected that "The Office" will in fact be returning next year for another laugh-less season. Perhaps we'll really luck out and Pam and Jim will have another quirky fucking kid.

I am a James Spader supporter, and I do find his character amusing, but the kind of role I expect him to play is his role in the movie "Crash" (the original nothing to do with the Oscar winner) starring Holly Hunter. It's a movie about people who have a strange sexual fetish that involves having sex near the scene of fatal car accidents. The concept is fucked, the cast is cool, the movie is way under the radar, and it's awesome. That's the kind of Spader I am interested in. His role as Robert California on "The Office" just doesn't make sense, kind of like Kathy Bates didn't make sense with her hacky Southern accent and her stupid dogs. They've both been stand-ins with about as much permanence as a henna tattoo.

I feel like NBC has some great shows "Parks and Recreation" uhhhh yeah that's kind of it. (I also secretly like "The Voice") Take a look at NBC's roster and tell me if you actually enjoy any of these garbage shows.

http://www.nbc.com/shows/

List of ways NBC could make "The Office" funny again.

1. Jim kills Pam and then himself.

2. Michael Scott comes back but every episode is based around his improv class and he writes, directs, and stars in "Threat Level Midnight II".

3. Kevin narrates every episode.

4. Creed becomes the boss and gets his own spinoff called "Creedence".

5. Ryan and Kelly become the main focus of the show and Kelly gets pregnant.

6. Todd Packer (David Koechner) is in every single episode drinking heavily.

ANK

House of Lies: Episode 3 Review

Another Sunday night of Showtime, another delivery of awesomeness from House of Lies.  I knew I would like this show because I never got tired of the "Big Balls" promo that ran all through fall and mid-winter during Dexter and Homeland.  Thankfully, it has yet to disappoint.

This episode brought a nice twist into the mix, with Greg Norbert reemerging at Galweather & Stearn with the shitastic news that they were buying the firm and privatizing their consulting.  Basically, he wanted to throw a gigantic middle finger into Marty's face for the events of episode 1.  You know: Marty meets stripper, brings stripper to business dinner, stripper pleasures client's wife in bathroom, chaos to follow.  As intriguing as their character dynamic may be, I think I'll get sick of Norbert very quick if he keeps trying to outsmart the great white shark that is Marty Kaan.

I absolutely love Marty's sidekicks, Doug and Clyde.  Their friend/relationship is hilarious and it's fun to see everyone ride Doug's ass about being such a square.  Jeannie (Bell) is a solid female counter to Marty, but she has yet to pull me in.  And I'm still waiting on that lingerie, ass-shaking scene from all the promos, cause those gave me half a chub.

One thing I really dig about this show is it's consistent story arc; funnyfunnyfunny until the final moments, which give us more dramatic insight into Marty and what he thinks about himself and his career.  With the threat of Galweather's board partnering with MetroCaptial, Marty's job is in jeopardy due to his destructive nature and closing tactics.  Skip and Marty's conversation on the balcony made it clear that Norbert wants Marty gone and Skip seems to want to do little to prevent that.  The shot of Marty's face as he speeds along in the stolen car was telling of how unstable he is.

I could literally gush for hours about Lies, it's an amazing show with an interesting and new concept, as well as some unique cinematography (though nothing will ever beat Breaking Bad's).  Nevertheless, Showtime continually knocks it out of the park.

Score: 10 out of 10

Are You Havin A Go?

This is my first article in a little while. I would say that I have been busy but that just doesnt sound right, lets keep going with 'Im really lazy'. I've actually been seeing alot of movies recently, to the point where I'm dangerously close to seeing Red Tails because ive seen everything else. I'm clearly losing my mind. Also if you would be interested in reading my thoughts on movies that I see, let me know and I may make your dreams a reality. I'd like to start by addressing the huge cliffhangers from the end of my last article that I'm sure havent left your thoughts for more than a moment these past weeks:

Am I an Archer guy? (Do I watch the show Archer?) The answer is yes. I didnt like this show at first because I thought the animation style was weird and I kind of just wrote it off. I've only seen 2 or 3 episodes now but the show is very watchable and witty and has some great voice talents. Watch it

Does Sliders hold up? No. It fucking stinks.

Recently I decided to take the month off Netflix because I didnt feel like paying for it and I watch it too much anyway. My television sickness then led me to Hulu where I happened upon Peep Show, a charming british series that is currently in its seventh season. It is a low budget comedy about two flatmates (British for roommates) bumbling through their lives. There is Mark (the straight man) and Jeremy (the wildcard). Both great characters and great actors playing them. I'm watching the 3rd episode of Season 1 as i type this. Mark just showed up to a party with a bag full of beers and is drinking by himself on the couch, watching Jeremy hit on chicks. He thinks his best chance at getting laid is if the girl Jeremy brings home accidentally walks into his room after using the bathroom. I'm only 3 episodes in and it just seems to be a show about these 2 getting into situations but I really like it. In between the dialogue, Mark and Jeremys thoughts can be heard. When this happens it is always very funny, personal, helps make them real and is not forced. It is what makes the show. The humor (humour?) is ridiculously dry and the story lines are simple and funny. I recommend you give it a shot if any of this sounds good to you. I love discovering a new show that has several seasons in the can, I have hours of this show to power through at my leisure. Ill write more when I have seen more, but this show is the real deal.

Another show I recently watched was another British entry: Life's Too Short, from Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, who created the original The Office and also Extras. Both amazing in my opinion, I had high hopes for this new show. The show is VERY british with a nice, simple pun of a title. The show features the actor Warwick Davis playing a version of himself that is basically a miniature David Brent from the Office. Delusional, pompous, desperately trying to look cool but failing at every turn. Whereas David Brent was all these things and somehow managed to be lovable, Warwick Davis just kind of annoyed me. He had some good moments here and there and is clearly not afraid of a good pratfall or cheap height joke, but this didnt need to be a series. Gervais and Merchant pop by once an episode playing versions of themselves that share not only an office but a desk, and appear to do nothing but entertain the notions of their clients who they cant stand. I expected more from this show. I can only recommend this to people who like 'cringe humor' type shows like The Office UK or Curb Your Enthusiasm, but with this show the cringe element is taken too far at times and just isnt funny or surprising. Like their other show Extras, this show is celebrity-cameo heavy. These cameos are probably the best sections of the show, Liam Neeson's attempt at stand up comedy was legendary.

Alright thats all for now. Thanks for reading, see you out there. Cliffhanger: Am I the new lead writer on Franklin & Bash?

House of Lies: Episode 2 Review

Another Sunday, another great episode of House of Lies.  I was a little skeptical after the series premiere, wondering if all the fourth wall, consulting jargon, lavishly over-the-top antics of the show would hold water, but here we are at episode two and I am hooked.  Marty and his team of associates are truly what holds this show together; they're relentless back and forth banter is hysterical and natural.  My two favorites are Doug (Josh Lawson) and Clyde (Ben Schwartz); Doug is painfully but hilariously awkward while Clyde is surprisingly suave and sharp.  Schwartz brings mannerisms to his character that could definitely draw comparisons to Andrew Garfield's portrayal of Eduardo Saverin in The Social Network.

The episode brought us Marty's team heading down to Phoenix, consulting with the divided (and married) owners of a basketball team.  While it was fun to watch them go to work with bringing the organization and its money back together, by far the best scene was Doug's interaction with Cat Deeley, of So You Think You Can Dance fame.  The whole segment culminated with his missed opportunity to get her number, while simultaneously filling his underpants with some not-so-lovely juice.  Women: 1, Doug: 0.

While the show primarily covers humor, the final scene brought in some serious drama with Marty's son, who's more than a little confused about his gender, asking him what a fudge-packer is.  Being bullied is a common issue in today's schools, it was interesting to see the show bring in some real world elements to its standard fiction.  How, as a parent, do you handle that question?  It will be intriguing to see how Marty deals with it, as he clearly loves his son unconditionally, but the same cannot be said for his devilish ex-wife, Monica.

All in all, this show is really shaping up to be another Showtime powerhouse, right in place with Homeland.  Next week's episode is sure to please, catch it Sunday at 10 after Shameless.

Score: 9 out of 10